Have you ever felt like something wasn’t right? Deep down inside you had a feeling like something was off. Your mind, body and soul were just not in sync?!
Your head was spinning and more then usual. You were forgetting simple tasks and even groceries at the store. And I mean, you paid for hot dogs but left the bag at the register, type of forgetting.
Well that was me. For the past couple of weeks. Something was not right.
I felt tired but I wasn’t.
I felt sick but not really.
Until….
I had a mommy meltdown. And I mean a full blow adult tantrum. I lost it!
But it was a normal day. The kids were great and all it took was one little thing to bring out the momster within.
I cried while I made dinner. I cried in the car. I cried while I was cleaning. It all came crashing down.
But I did not want to talk about it.
I did not want to discuss what was bothering me because I felt guilty. I felt guilty for being sad. I felt guilty for being needy and overwhelmed. I felt guilty for being a human being!! What?
I kept telling myself that I am a strong woman! I am an adult. I don’t need ANYTHING or ANYONE!
But really I DO!
I need my husband. I need my kids. I need my family and friends. I need support. It really takes a village and I was trying too damn hard to be a ONE woman show! AND that is not normal or okay.
I had to regroup! But not before all of the built up of stress, exhaustion and emotions came out. I was a fire-breathing dragon but it sure felt good. I felt 20 pounds lighter and I felt stronger for speaking what was on my mind. I needed to be heard and for that I have to give credit to my husband! He was so patient with me and really listening. It made a huge difference and I could not be more grateful for him.
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So if you are in the same boat and you feel the fire-breathing dragon within you – call a friend. Call your significant other. Talk to someone before you have a mommy meltdown too! But just know that you are not alone. We are all fighting some demons inside and we all need to vent from time to time. Just don’t think that you have to do it alone even when it feels like it’s easier said then done.
Breath and know that you are worth it!
xo,
Dijana
Even though I may seem like I have my sh*t together all of the time – I don’t! None of us really do.
