Conditioned to chase belonging instead of becoming

So many girls and women grow up believing they have to belong to a group to matter. They spend years chasing friendships, questioning themselves, and wondering why they never quite fit in. But here’s the thing — you are not broken. You’re not “too much” or “not enough.”

The problem isn’t you — it’s the belief that your worth is tied to being part of a circle.

Look around. So many women feel lonely, even in groups. That tells you something: this isn’t about who you are — it’s about how we’ve been conditioned to chase belonging instead of becoming.

Imagine what would happen if you took all that energy spent overthinking, comparing, and self-doubting — and redirected it toward growing, creating, becoming. When you show up as your full self, unapologetically, you stop attracting people who require you to shrink. You start drawing in those who see you and get you.

Truth is, some people find their tribe easily. Others don’t. But that doesn’t mean you’re meant to be alone — it just means your people are different. They’re deeper. Fewer. Realer. So don’t waste another minute trying to fit into places you’ve outgrown. Focus on becoming. On healing. On shining. And trust that the right people will meet you there.

And in the meantime? Cherish the one or two people who already care. Because those quiet, loyal connections? They’re gold. Don’t overlook them chasing a picture-perfect group that might not even exist.

Until next time, check out my other work here.

X, Dijana